Coughing.

Real bad. I can't remember if I've ever had this kind of cough. It feels like chesty cough. Oh, and if you haven't realised yet. It's 10:18am and I'm not at school. Too sick. Well I could go if I wanted to but I'd be coughing like all day and leaving the classroom every 2 minutes or something.

So this is what I've done so far today:
-45 minutes of piano.
-Fixed my long pole. That's right. I fixed it! :D WOOOO! I also duct-taped the two ends so any edges wouldn't cut my brother anymore, you know, since it's getting a little rusty. I don't think I've actually cut my brother with it before (if I have, it would have been accident) but because the edges are edgy, they have scratched him, didn't draw blood though. (accident :D)

Speaking of my brother, tomorrow it is his birthday. And I've got the perfect present. :) I WOULD put it up but some person that might hate me or maybe just for lulz will tell him or sabatage the present. So yeah, I'll tell you once I give it to him.

And another thing. I've just discovered how awesome the 'shuffle' button is when combined with long playlists. :D I know, I'm like what? 20 years in the past? Oh, and on VLC media player, it's called 'random' makes sense, right? I accidentally hit the 'R' key (I found out later) and then my songs went all over the place (the playlist contains my favourite songs of the past couple of years).

So I don't have to listen to the same thing over and over. I know, I'm really behind in technology but yeah. Discovering this kind of stuff makes me happy. :)

Like that time I discovered Skype. FREE skype-to-skype calls. xD

Or that time I discovered USB sticks. Everybody called me a retard but it's so awesome. You can rewrite them like thousands of times.

Then there was that time I discovered the stretchiness of my foreskin. MAN! That was a good day. Had so much fun.

Or that time I discovered that you bleed more when your veins get cut. That wasn't a very great day. It was rather messy. But still something I'm proud of discovering.

Then there was that time I discovered how much fun fire can be. Like it spreads so fast. I burned so many of my things. Just for the fun of it. I thought I might be a pyromaniac but nah. I'm not. I just like fire. A lot.

Or that time I discovered carpet. Like I always walked on it. It was merely there to keep my feet warm or whatever. But then I slept on the ground and it was REALLY good. Very comfortable.

Then when I re-discovered my bed, SOFTER THAN THE GROUND!

Then I discovered USB mouse. You can just PLUG IT IN AND TA-DA! You can even plug TWO IN! WHOAAA.

Or that time I discovered I can change the colour of my piss by controlling how much water I drink. I stopped drinking water for like 1 week and it was freaking dark orange. On top of that, it had 1 inch of sediment at the bottom of the bottle (Yeah, I peed in a bottle). It was pretty disturbing. I had drunk so much it was saturated. O_O. That's weird. Powder coming out my penis....that's for old men having sex. Not for pissing teenagers.

Or that time I discovered the stretchyness of the anal sphincter. Not my anal sphincter, however. That was the day I was goatse'd. Goatse.cx Well at least that WAS the URl adress. It's gone now. Just google, 'Goatse' and knock yourself out. ;D
For those of you (hopefully all of you. I mean none of you. :D) who didn't visit it it's just some (russian?) guy using his hands to hold open his anus. Did you know that a group of people surfed through hundred of gigabytes of gay porn and they eventually found goatse. They found him by matching the mole pattern on his ass with the mole pattern of the pornstar. Goatse started with fingers, buttplugs and now he can fit a freaking bedpost (10cm diameter) up his anus. So hardcore. >_>

How do I know this? I encyclopediadramatica.com 'ed it. It's not that I'm into this kind of stuff. I was just searching up random shock websites to get my friends when I came across this and then as there were no pictures on the webpage (except the occasional one or two on the side depicting it). So I read the story of goatse. Plus I'm me. Cattermole. It should be expected of me to know this kind of stuff.

.....or that time I discovered blogging. Which was April the 4th. My first post. Probably one of the better things I discovered. (Except for stretchy foreskins. As in, if you are a girl and readnig this, let me tell you. They. Can. STREEEEEEETCH.)

And if you're a guy then should know ;D and if you haven't tried, TRY! And if you're circumcised then LOL! Jew. :)

And if you're not Jewish but you are circumcised, you have missed out on one of the greatest pleasures of this world.

I rest my case. Good day to you all. I hope you don't become sick like me. *nods seriously*

Bye.

ZOO

It has been a while 'Mind of Jon'...by which I mean two days.

If the reason why you're reading this is because the blog is titled, 'Zoo' and you're hoping for some crappy soft-core-pornographic magazine then leave my blog and go watch porn, because this blog is not about porn.

HOWEVER, in a way it is ;D (some will know what I'm talking about already).
This blog is titled, 'Zoo' because Me, my friends in Biology, the rest of the people in my biology class that aren't my friends, and the other biology class, we ALL went to Weribee open range zoo for a biology excursion on 'reproductive strategies' AND the male lion was on top/behind the female lion shagging her with his penis in her vagina, they were copulating, they were having sex, they were reproducing, hence, the soft-core pornographic content. Although penis-vagina ANIMAL sex is rather hardcore....

If you haven't noticed already, that is my highlight of the day, seeing two lions get it on. ^_^ *tongue flickers in a rapidly wildly vividly sexually and penetratively way*

So yeah... we saw some random animals called barynx, onyx, onynx, onanynxynxyanxyanx or something, I forget the actual name. Giraffe (they had hybrids giraffes with REALLY hairy tails LOL), zebra (as we drove past on the safari vehicle we saw the zebra's massive penis hanging down (my arm length? or something, maybe a little longer...) When I saw the zebra.... I suddenly felt inadequate....)

Then there was the monkeys, the meercats, etc etc.

We got to touch a snake....it felt leathery
We got to touch a frog..... it felt half leathery half smooth but covered in slime, so slimy....
We got to touch the zebra's penis.... just kidding, we weren't allowed to.

Then we saw the rhinoceroses.... one was shitting as we drove past
Then we saw the bison.... one was peeing as we drove past

I bought a doughnut and bowl of chips (expensive) but I didn't really care, and still don't really care... maybe I have depression again? nah.... it's just food xD

As I walked through that one-way spinny exit thing to leave the zoo when I got out I was like "something is wrong. Something is missing. *feels pockets* Where is my pencil... WHERE IS MY PENCIL?!?! ahh crap" thomas: "I told you you dropped it but you ignored me" me: "haha, whatever, you're bullshitting me"
thomas: "no really, you dropped your pencil and I told you, but you ignored me"
me: "dude, I know you're lying, why do you keep trying?" (I was on my last inch of hope he really was lying)
thomas: "but you really did drop it"
me: "ahhh crap...."

That was a good pencil.... I miss it, So I wrote this poem for it:

On a distant land called Werribee
In a zoo, where the animals are free
To roam as it is open range
There is one thing that is strange

A pencil lies on the ground over there
Not shit, not piss, but a pencil, that's rare!
This pencil belong to none other than
Me, a pencilless lonely man

I miss my pencil, over there in the zoo
Right now, it could be lying in a pile of poo
Or maybe monkeys are using it to
Scratch their head, which I know monkey's do

Oh well, I shall never ever know
What happened to my pencil though,
I know in my heart that, that pencil will be
The only pencil, ever, EVER for me

I miss it ='[

I typed that whole poem on the spot, improvisation. I haven't done that in a while. My friend said I should take up rap. But as if I can rap, I'm crap at that. <--- LOL, xD

But seriously, I haven't got a rapper's instinct, like the on the spot PERFORMING. Rhymes, meh, no problem. But performing, noooo.......

So that's MY day
Lost pencils, bison's peeing, zebra's hanging out their penis, rhino's shitting, and lions getting it on ;D

I like the zoo =]